


say your prayers and mark the spot

by lady_laverty



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Dehumanization, Gen, Mind Control, Mindwiping, dont look at me this is really bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-23
Updated: 2014-04-23
Packaged: 2018-01-20 13:00:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1511477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lady_laverty/pseuds/lady_laverty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Soldier is moulded, created; you serve the mother country before anything else.</p>
            </blockquote>





	say your prayers and mark the spot

**Author's Note:**

> Result of a prompt I gave myself and large amount of caffeine and stress.

The Soldier is moulded, created; _you serve the mother country before anything else_.

You do not have family friends but something tickles at the back of your mind, a gaping hole that grows and grows every wipe, every crackle that burns through your mind, a sense of loss.

You do not understand so you do not tell. It is your secret, your only secret, in between the wipes and cryo sleeps.

\--

Do not question.

Do not ask questions.

Hydra is the question and the answer.

_You are a gift to mankind._

\--

You follow the Iranian scientist and the red headed woman.

There is no need for lethal action on the red headed woman.

 _Natalia Alianovna Romanova_ , your mind whispers and your hands shake as you disengage your rifle.

\--

You scream and scream voice hoarse and scratchy, as the wipe takes over and erases everything and the bit cracks and splinters in your mouth as you clench your teeth. You should not have asked the question, should not have questioned who the woman was, it was a mistake and the Soldier does not make mistake or conscientious objections to a kill order.

There’s a whisper of a name and a number that floats through your mind as they place you in cryo and you reach out, and your handlers stare and stare at you as your body freezes but you mind is still there. _Still awake and you scream_.

\--

_Mission: eliminate Direction Fury, Nicholas J._

\--

You take shots through windows and at cars, complete your objective.

Pierce slaps you, _report!_

“Who was the man on the bridge?”

Your mind is screaming, panicking, cracks forming and dissolving all you had known. You are confused and scared, you should not be scared and it makes you pliant. Makes you weak as the shove you back towards the machine, towards losing every little bit that you had gained, _you do not understand_.

\--

_“But I knew him.”_

\--

You are to eliminate the threat. Captain Steven Rogers, _Captain America_ , for the sake of the Project. You are to destroy him and his remains; anyone who objects is an enemy of the state and must be destroyed.

\--

You are a weapon.

You are a weapon.

You lacked purpose before but now you have purpose.

_You are a weapon and and and and—_

\--

You do not know why you pulled him from the river with the burning ashes of Hydra’s supreme plan falling around you. You discard him on the bank as people will be scouring the area soon. It is time to check in with your handlers. It is time for a wipe. You are remembering, painful flashes—

_Laughing as a hand runs through golden hair—_

_“-vie, buddy, what are you doin’ do you want to get yourself killed—”_

You slam into a nearby tree and jostle your wounded arm.

Your cheek stands for a suitable bit for the time being. Til you check in with your handlers.

\--

You shiver as you wait at the rendezvous point. It is in the city, on the outskirts of the business district. Your uniform has begun to harden with your blood, the Soldier’s blood, whose blood is it? You don’t know anymore and you don’t like not knowing. It can compromise current and future missions and _your work has been a gift to mankind—_

You don’t like not knowing, as you sit in a bus station, holding your ruined flesh and blood arm to your chest _(Mother Russia’s chest, everything for Mother Russia)_ something whistles behind you and you drop to the ground—

You are in a battlefield and there’s no one but yourself aware of it.


End file.
